How Not to Let Your Family Squeeze

By
Jeff Motske, CFP®
October 8, 2018
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Your Financial Future Family ties are amazing. These connections, based in DNA, history and genuine care, can prompt many to support their loved ones through times of need, be it emotional, physical and even financial. It is natural to want to support your family, but the players involved can double (or even triple or quadruple in cases of blended families), increasing the financial strain. Since these familial situations can snowball quite quickly, I urge you to focus first on your own financial independence and be sure not to let your parents and your children squeeze your financial future. While many hate to be a burden on their family, it’s actually quite common for people to financially assist other family members. According to Ameritrade’s Financial Support Study, one-fifth of Americans are Financial Supporters, meaning they provide financial support to a parent and/or an adult child.1 A survey conducted by GoBankingRates found that 63 percent of children plan to financially support their parents in some way once they retire.2 On the other end, parents are also financially supporting their grown children. Per Financial Planning OWS, 24% are helping with rent and 39% are paying cell phone bills.3

My primary advice is to always pay yourself first. Be sure to establish a healthy emergency fund and contribute to your retirement. It’s similar to what you hear on airplanes about placing the oxygen mask on yourself before placing it on others. You need to be sure that you are fiscally secure before you provide for those who are financially struggling. This is very sound, logical advice, which can be difficult to follow once emotions come into play.

Most of the decisions I see my clients struggle with are when the emotional and the financials are at odds. When your daughter wants to go to that expensive, out-of-state college that you didn’t save enough for, it’s tempting to try to make it work, whatever means necessary. Or perhaps your son is going through a costly divorce, and the only way you feel you can support him and ensure you see your grandkids is to borrow from your retirement to hire him a good lawyer. These are the moments when you need to be able to tell your child and yourself, “No”. In most cases, there are other options and alternatives in place. They may not be the dream situation, but they will still get the job done. Don’t sacrifice your future for your child’s dream, no matter how compelling. Don’t let emotions cloud good judgment.

On the other end of the spectrum, is a harsh reality. When dealing with parents who may not have planned sufficiently or are in the midst of a financial crisis, be sure that you are communicating as one adult to another. If possible, you may want to tackle those financial conversations early. Some of these difficult financial conversations with parents are tied to medical issues, so be sure to discuss before physical situations become dire.

When you find yourself in the midst of these difficult situations, please don’t forget about your support system. Your financial advisor can act as an unbiased referee in moments of disagreement or emotional struggle. They will likely remember the important financial issues that may slip your mind and will be ruled by numbers rather than nostalgia. At the moments when you need a pragmatic perspective to shine through the cloud of emotions, a trusted financial advisor can be invaluable.

In a time where many people find themselves part of the Sandwich Generation, taking on financial burdens can seem inevitable. Yet, so much can be avoided and accomplished when you act in advance. Start chatting with mom and dad while they’re still in good physical and financial health. Start saving for colleges as early as possible. When you’re proactive, you can prepare. When you’re reactive, people and finances can take a hit.

  1. https://s1.q4cdn.com/959385532/files/doc_downloads/research/TDA-Financial-Support-Study-2015.pdf
  2. https://www.gobankingrates.com/retirement/planning/kids-plan-financially-support-parents-retirement/
  3. https://www.forbes.com/sites/carolynrosenblatt/2018/07/09/aging-parents-helping-adult-children-financially-unhealthy-results/#321bb1e2ef39

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By
Diane Zing, CSA
June 11, 2018

Paying taxes is inevitable. The key to being as efficient as possible about how much one pays in taxes requires careful consideration of the big picture. And while many people simply want to know if they can have a tax-free retirement, it really starts with being clear about how and when taxes get paid…and to defining what a “tax-free retirement” actually means. For example, if someone is striving to have income during retirement that is tax-free AT THAT TIME, then there are a plethora of investment and insurance products out there that could help defer taxes on earnings, and potentially, have tax-free withdrawal benefits for some types of accounts. But that doesn’t mean retirement is “tax-free”.

Let’s clarify what a few of the most common types of taxes are:

Income Tax – taxation on earned income can occur on many levels; local, state and federal. The amount a person would have to pay varies greatly on their situation. And, there are various types of tax credits that could affect the amount of taxes that would be paid on income. Any earned income that is deferred into a qualified retirement account generally means that taxes on that income won’t get paid at the time it is earned, but when that income is taken at a later date, during retirement, taxes are paid at that time. The idea that paying taxes on income later, when one might be in a lower income tax bracket, might prove more beneficial. But a) there is no guarantee what the tax rates will be in the future, and b) there may be several other factors with a person’s overall taxation that could affect what is perceived as a benefit. A tax professional is the best person to help folks evaluate what kinds of strategies are best for their overall situation. At the end of the day, SOME form of income tax will be paid, either when it is received upon earning, or when it is withdrawn from a qualified plan “down the road” in retirement.

What can be done to possibly reduce these taxes? Speak to a tax professional about what tax credits might apply, and also review with them if itemized deductions can play a role in reducing taxation.

Sales Tax – taxation occurs on state levels for various goods and services that get purchased. The percentage of taxation is usually based on the price of said goods and/or services. But that percentage charged can vary greatly from state to state, or even within different municipalities. There are a few states that don’t have any sales tax on most goods and services.

Excise Tax – taxation that is applied to specific types of goods; gas, cigarettes, beer, liquor, etc. These are typically nicknamed as “sin products”. Taxes received for these particular products are generally used to help raise money for bringing awareness to the potential dangers of these products.

What can be done to manage sales and excise tax? Not much. These types of taxes are very hard to “manage”. Changes in lifestyle; consumption of goods that fall within this category, will obviously affect the amount of sales taxes paid.

Property Tax – taxation that is applied to property owned. Taxes received tend to go towards local municipality needs. The amount of property taxes charged is usually based on a percentage of the value of the property.

What can be done to manage or alleviate property tax? Renting instead of owning might prove beneficial with alleviating property tax. However, there may be tax benefits also lost by being a renter instead of an owner. Again, a tax professional is best for helping to calculate what the tax benefits are for both scenarios.

It might not be possible to have a completely tax-free retirement, but by working with a financial professional and a tax professional, the ability to strategize investments and manage how taxation occurs could prove very beneficial. It’s not just about saving and investing…it’s about being as savvy as possible with the decisions along the way.

By Trilogy Financial
August 1, 2023

A romance scam, also known as an online dating scam, is when a person gets tricked into believing they’re in a romantic relationship with someone they met online, when in fact their other half is a cybercriminal using a fake identity to gain enough trust to ask — or blackmail — them for money.

Oftentimes, a romance scammer starts on dating sites or apps. But scammers have increasingly started finding targets on social media, too.

After connecting with someone through a fake profile, the scammer will strike up a conversation and start building a relationship by regularly chatting with them. Once they start to trust the romance scammer and believe they have a truthful relationship, the cybercriminal will make up a story, ask them for money, and vanish.

Types of Romance Scams

Some of the most common internet dating scams include:       

Fake Dating Sites: Scam dating sites claim to be legitimate but are actually filled with scammers or underpopulated. These websites are created to mine your information.

Photo Scams: Scammers will convince their target to send their personal information in exchange for intimate photos.

Military Romance Scams: The scammer will pose as a military member, likely deployed. They build trust by using military jargon and titles, then ask for money to cover military-related expenses, such as flights home.

Intimate Activity Scams: The scammer connects with their target on multiple social media websites. Once they become closer, the scammer convinces them to undress and then threatens them with the recordings.

Code Verification Scams: Scammers will send a fake verification code through email or text, posing to be a dating app or website. Once clicked on, it will ask for their personal information, including Social Security number and credit cards.

Inheritance Scams: Scammers will make their target believe they need to get married in order to get their inheritance. In this case, they will ask them to help pay for something like airfare.

Malware Scams: Malware is also common on dating sites. In this case, the recipient will interact with a scammer who sends them a website that looks legitimate; however, it's a page that includes malware.

Tips To Avoid Losing Money To a Romance Scam

  • Protect yourself and older loved ones by raising awareness. Although this can be an uncomfortable topic, make sure you, your family and your friends are familiar with romance scams. The more you know about these scams, the better prepared you are to prevent being a victim.
  • Check in on older loved ones. Scammers are seeking to target those living alone or grieving the loss of a spouse as they are more vulnerable.
  • Limit what you share online.Scammers can use details shared on social media and dating sites to better understand and target you.
  • Do your research.Research the individual’s photo and profile using online searches to see if the image, name or other details have been used elsewhere.
  • Go slowly and ask lots of questions.Don’t let the individual rush you to leave a dating service or social media site to communicate directly.
  • Listen to your gut.If the individual seems too good to be true, talk to someone you trust.
  • Don’t overshare personal information.Requests for inappropriate photos or financial information could later be used to extort you.
  • Be suspicious if you haven’t met in person.If the individual promises to meet in person, but consistently comes up with an excuse for cancelling, be suspicious.
  • Don’t send money.Never send money to anyone you have only communicated with online or by phone.

Think you’ve been scammed?

  1. Stop communicating with the individual immediately.
  2. Talk to someone you trust and describe what’s going on.
  3. Report the incident to local law enforcement.
  4. Submit a fraud complaint with the Federal Trade Commission.

Dating scams can have devastating consequences on individuals seeking love and companionship online. It's crucial to be aware of the red flags and take necessary precautions to protect yourself from falling victim to these fraudulent schemes. Even if it’s too late to recoup losses, details may help others from becoming a victim.

 

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