4 Ways to Take the Taboo Out of Talking About Money with Your Spouse

By
Jeff Motske, CFP®
November 26, 2018
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Money is a commonly held taboo topic, like politics and religion. We just don’t feel comfortable talking about them – especially to people we care about. That’s because these topics are tied closely to how we view ourselves. These topics also garner a lot of judgment, and the last thing we want is to be judged on something that we feel is intrinsically linked to our intelligence or sense of maturity. Yet, by practicing a few simple tips, we can start tackling the taboo topic of family finances and get on that path to financial independence.

Be Honest

It is human nature to want to hide things we may not be proud of or want to avoid. Perhaps you charged a bit too much to your credit cards or haven’t saved as much as you planned for all of your family’s goals. You may want to avoid addressing such issues, but those who are part of your financial household need to know the honest, unvarnished state of your finances. Trying to hide the facts will just compound your issues when they come to light – and they will.

Be Frequent

Don’t just talk about money when money is a problem. That’s when stress levels are high and emotions are frayed. What needs to be a level-headed discussion can quickly escalate into an emotional shouting match. Instead, conversations about finances should become routine. If you schedule a monthly financial date night with your spouse, the frequent exposure will minimize the surprise and anxiety from these talks. Ultimately, there will be fewer surprises and more planning to help when unexpected or hard decisions need to be made.

Be Open to Feedback

You and your spouse are a team. Teams succeed by working together towards the same goals. Teammates, though, don’t always see things the same way and may have different approaches to the same objective. That’s why it’s important to get your spouse’s input on how your finances are being managed. Not only does your spouse’s input ensure you’re working towards the same goals, but different perspectives can also provide multiple solutions to financial issues. Most importantly, your spouse feels heard and validated, which is a precious thing to give to the one you love.

Be Non-Judgmental

What causes many to shy away from discussing finances is the idea that they will be judged for things they did or did not do with their money. Did you mismanage your funds and refrain from saving sufficiently? Were you too risky with your investments or not risky enough to provide for the household? To avoid the judgment, most will just avoid talking about their finances all together, which doesn’t often have good outcomes. Avoidance doesn’t help financial situations – it often just prolongs the mess. To help your spouse open up, it is beneficial to allow them to speak openly and freely and to listen without judgment.

I do believe that it is imperative to take the taboo out of talking about money with your spouse. Both of you should foster frequent and honest financial discussions, free of strife and judgment. Doing these things will allow you to solidify yourselves as a strong financial team and set you on your path for collective financial independence.

The opinions voiced in this material are for general information only and are not intended to provide specific advice or recommendations for any individual.

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By Trilogy Financial
July 23, 2019

Like many in my generation, I prefer to subconsciously minimize the odds that I’ll become ill and ignore the reality that I’ll eventually pass. Unfortunately, the harsh reality is that illness and death are inevitable. Enter another subject we tend to ignore: Life Insurance. For many Americans – particularly young and/or single adults, life insurance is nothing more than a plot point in a Hollywood movie or true crime drama: the money collected by remaining relatives after someone has passed. However, life insurance, like health insurance, is just something you need to have. It can provide financial security for your loved ones, cover end of life expenses, and can even provide tax free income.

There are two different types of life insurance: temporary and permanent. The most common form of temporary insurance is Term insurance. Term typically lasts for a specified “term” of years, hence its name. Permanent – on the other hand – stays with you for your entire life, provided you continue to pay the premium, or have developed an account value large enough you no longer have to pay in. There are a wide variety of insurance policies available under the permanent life insurance umbrella, such as: whole life, universal life, variable universal life, and indexed universal life.

To put in another way, Term insurance can be thought of as renting insurance. You pay a monthly premium for the coverage but once the specified term of time is up that coverage goes away. The term can vary from 5 years up to 30 years. With some companies you can continue the policy, but you will have to pay premiums that are a multiple of what you had been paying during the “term” of the contract. It is used to provide protection for liabilities that will disappear after a certain time period ex: raising children, your mortgage, or income replacement. In your 20s-50s you have more people depending on you; therefore, if something were to happen to you (e.g. illness, death) you need an insurance policy that will take care of the people you support. If you pass away, you need enough coverage to pay off any existing debt, provide income replacement, and cover any other miscellaneous expenses associated with supporting your family. This coverage makes a difficult time a little bit easier by reducing the financial burden and allowing loved ones time to grieve without worrying about impending bills. Term insurance is perfect for this type of coverage as it has the lowest premiums and can be structured to disappear once certain liabilities disappear (e.g. mortgage is paid off, kids are out of the house, and your income is no longer critical to the security of your family).

Permanent Insurance, on the other hand, can be framed as owning the insurance coverage. As with term insurance, you pay a monthly premium; however, the coverage stays with you for the rest of your life, not just a specified term of time. Once your family is out of the house and your liabilities are decreased you still want to maintain some level of insurance coverage to cover end of life expenses and provide for loved ones. Permanent insurance is a great choice to cover these remaining liabilities. The premiums for permanent insurance are higher than those for term insurance because, unlike term – where the insurance company may not ever have to pay out the policy- permanent insurance means a guaranteed payout – assuming you’ve paid the premium. At some point the insurance company will have to pay. Additionally, part of these monthly premiums are placed into a cash value account which, depending on the type of policy, earns a fixed or variable rate of return and can provide tax free income. This income can be used to fund an early retirement as it can be accessed prior to age 59 ½ – the age required to legally withdraw from retirement plans without incurring penalties.

But what if you want to access the death benefit in an insurance policy without having to die – sound too good to be true? In fact, some insurance policies allow you to access death benefits before actual death! These policies feature Accelerated Benefit Riders (ABRs) which allow you to accelerate (or, in other words, use) the death benefit while still alive to cover certain terminal, chronic, or critical illnesses. Unlike health insurance, which only reimburses medical expenses, ABRs provide tax free money for you to use as you wish, assuming you have an ABR event. You can use this money for experimental treatments that health insurance will not cover or use it to travel the world. There are no restrictions on how the money is spent.

Now you know about life insurance and the many different options and benefits available to you – consider working with a financial planner to discuss the right life insurance policy for your needs.

If you have questions about insurance or any other aspect of your financial life please do not hesitate to reach out to me at zach.swaffer@trilogyfs.com

This article contains only general descriptions and is not a solicitation to sell any insurance product or security, nor is it intended as any financial or tax advice. For information about specific insurance needs or situations, contact your insurance agent. This article is intended to assist in educating you about insurance generally and not to provide personal service. Guarantees are based on the claims paying ability of the issuing company.

The opinions voiced in this material are for general information only and are not intended to provide specific advice or recommendations for any individual.

By
David McDonough
October 25, 2019

There are some who see retirement as a finish line. I feel like this is slightly misleading. In actuality, quite a lot can still be accomplished at this time in your life. Rather than viewing retirement as a reprieve from the hustle and bustle, I like to see it as a final chapter to solidify your life’s success. How that looks, though, is entirely up to you.

The first step to ensure your life’s success is determining how you personally define that. This is a big picture question. Think about what you want said about you at your eulogy. What do you want to be known for? How do you want to be remembered when you’re no longer around? Some people focus on family and personal relationships. Others look to leaving a legacy or collecting memorable life experiences. This is clearly a deeply personal definition. Don’t look to the Joneses to define that for you.

Once you make the determination of what you want the next chapter to represent, it’s time to figure out what that looks like for you. Does a focus on family mean weekly family dinners at your home or visiting all the professional baseball fields throughout the United States with your children? Does leaving a legacy mean you want your name on a building or does it mean funding your grandchildren’s college fund? Does collecting memorable experiences mean getting an RV and traveling around the country or high-adrenaline activities like jumping out of an airplane? The clearer the vision, the better you can prepare to make it a reality.

Now the last step is making the proper preparations to see this vision come to fruition. Life can throw you curve balls. Make sure that if it does, you’re prepared. Be sure to have a financial plan and meet regularly with your trusted advisor. Create an estate plan and make sure your affairs are in order to ensure that you finish the victory lap of your life well.

The opinions voiced in this material are for general information only and are not intended to provide specific advice or recommendations for any individual. To determine what is appropriate for you, consult a qualified professional.

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