4 Ways to Take the Taboo Out of Talking About Money with Your Spouse

Each of our lives is comprised of elements that create a story. Our financial lives are no different – the elements include our bank accounts, retirement accounts, mortgages, car loans, student loans, investment accounts, stock options at work, life insurance policies, credit cards, etc. When most people think of their financial life, they think of these elements but have trouble contextualizing them in their overall financial story. All of these elements are simply tools that either help or deter us from our goals. Before analyzing the tools, it’s important to understand why you’re using them and the goals and priorities that create the story which requires them.

One way people analyze these tools is by researching investment returns. Before delving into the world of returns, think about why you are investing in the first place. Your investments should reflect your overall financial priorities. If the risk tolerance in your investment appropriately reflects the time-frame you plan on needing the money, then worrying about investment returns day-to-day can be more of a headache than it’s worth. For example, if you are 35 years old saving for retirement at 60 – you should be aggressively invested if you’re comfortable with that. Because you have 25 years before you plan on using the money, short-term fluctuations in the market shouldn’t really concern you. In fact, if the market does go down and you are still contributing to your retirement, you are technically “buying on sale” – getting more shares for the same dollar value. Contributing to your retirement in up-and-down markets is called “dollar-cost-averaging” – meaning you average out the cost/share of an investment by contributing consistently rather than trying to time the market and invest when you are “buying low”.

There are many benchmarks in the financial industry to compare your investments to and track performance. Some examples include the S&P500 and the Dow Jones Industrial Average for large-cap stocks, the Barclays US Aggregate Bond Index for bonds, and the MSCI Index for international investments. It’s important to understand how your investments are doing in relation to the overall market – it keeps you abreast of what you are investing in and prompts questions you may not ask otherwise – such as what fees you are paying, who’s helping you decide what to invest in, and how much risk you’re taking on compared to the benchmarks you’re using as a comparison. However, the benchmark you should habitually pay more attention to than any other is your particular goal with each investment and your overall goals in terms of building wealth.

Focusing on investment returns only paints half of the picture when tracking progress because it is completely out of your control. If you can confidently say your investments are well diversified and invested according to a risk-tolerance you are comfortable with, there is a much more important benchmark to track than returns. Instead of relying on your investment vehicles to do all the heavy-lifting, you should use your investment behavior as the ultimate indicator to determine if you’re making progress or need more work. What are the financial goals you have in mind? To retire by 55? To save for a second down payment on a house? To pay off your mortgage? Help your children pay for their college tuition? Protect your investments and family in case of a long-term illness? Reduce credit cards and student loans? Build emergency savings?

When you are focused on goal-based financial planning, there are a lot of benchmarks to concern yourself with other than the hype involved in investment performance. Are you saving more this year than you were last year? Did you increase your savings rate when you received a raise? Does the money you are spending appropriately reflect the values and priorities that are most important to you? Are you using extra income to increase investments and decrease liabilities? By focusing on why you’re investing in the first place and the priorities that matter to you, it’s easier to ask the right questions and monitor progress. Once you know what you’re shooting for, a Decision Coach can help you understand the appropriate tools to get there.

The Standard & Poor’s 500 Index is a capitalization weighted index of 500 stocks designed to measure performance of the broad domestic economy through changes in the aggregate market value of 500 stocks representing all major industries.

The Dow Jones Industrial Average is comprised of 30 stocks that are major factors in their industries and widely held by individuals and institutional investors.

The Bloomberg Barclays U.S. Aggregate Bond Index is an index of the U.S. investment-grade fixed-rate bond market, including both government and corporate bonds.

The MSCI EAFE Index is a free float-adjusted market capitalization index that is designed to measure the equity market performance of developed markets, excluding the US & Canada. The MSCI EAFE Index consists of the following developed country indices: Australia, Austria, Belgium, Denmark, Finland, France, Germany, Hong Kong, Ireland, Israel, Italy, Japan, the Netherlands, New Zealand, Norway, Portugal, Singapore, Spain, Sweden, Switzerland and the UK.

Each index is an unmanaged index which cannot be invested into directly. Unmanaged index returns do not reflect fees, expenses, or sales charges. Index performance is not indicative of the performance of any investment. Past performance is no guarantee of future results.

What does retirement actually look like? Some people might say they will literally “turn in their papers”, go home, then putz around the house and tinker with projects for the rest of their life. Others might say they want to travel the world. Some might say they don’t actually want to “retire”, but would rather transition to work they are passionate about, without having to worry about what kind of income they receive. The bottom line is that we tend to have some idea of what we dream it to be. The problem is, there are factors that can contribute to turning our dreamy retirement into a complete nightmare.

Trying to predict that our retirement will end up being exactly as we have planned it to be is like shooting an arrow towards a bullseye as we are blindfolded. It COULD happen, but there are a lot of “what ifs” circling around our idea of a perfect retirement. For instance, what if we retire and expect to putz around the house doing projects for the rest of our life, and find that by week three we are bored out of our mind, yet we didn’t prepare or invest in doing anything different? What if we expected to travel the world, but before retiring, develop health issues that prevent us from being able to do so? The “what ifs” can be a real game changer, not only to what we get to do, but how we would be prepared to pay for it.

Here are some tips to consider when thinking about how to prepare for retirement:

Retirement vs. Financial Independence. Trying to decide now, at our current age, what retirement has to be can be quite stressful. Maybe we don’t have a clue what it should look like in regards to activities and how we will spend our time. So instead of trying to define what retirement might look like, maybe focus on working towards financial independence. Financial independence means over the course of a long-term, disciplined effort, we work with our advisors to help us make financial and protection planning decisions that lead to financial strength over time. Disciplined effort and long-term commitment are key factors when trying to build financial security. This might prove helpful with preparing for whatever retirement ends up looking like.

Planning before Investing. There are thousands of licensed financial professionals whom would love nothing more than to manage our assets by investing in the market. Many go into this with the sole goal of simply “growing assets”. They tend to focus on returns, and believe that we only want to hear that our investments are “going up” consistently. Seeing our account values “go up” is all the satisfaction they think we desire. And with that, they tend to feel like we are on track for retirement. BUT, this is not a guarantee. We can’t predict or control the markets, so this is an example of shooting that arrow blindfolded, hoping we land in the middle. Instead, consider focusing on what your assets need to DO. What job do our assets have? Knowing what the job is upfront will help us make more informed decisions not only on how to invest, but with what kind of risk we can afford to subject ourselves to. Risk management might prove just as critical as growing assets.

Start NOW! Financial planning for retirement could prove far more difficult if we wait to the last minute, vs. making effort starting now. It might seem daunting to think we have to “do everything at once”, but focusing on our future needs is just as important as focusing on our current needs. It might seem difficult to do everything at once, but that’s why working with a financial advisor who values planning prior to investing blindly might prove helpful.

We are all unique in what our lives and dreams are. And whether we are focused on exactly what we want retirement to be, or simply have no idea, the common theme is that the closer we are to having financial independence, the better chance we have of being more prepared. Financial independence shines the light on our options, which might help to make our dreams come true.  And just like when we were kids in a dark room, the nightmares tend to not go away until we turned on the lights!