How to Know If You’re Really Ready

Do you remember Veruca Salt, the spoiled rich girl from the movie Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory? You know, the girl who yells at her father, “I want it now!” And her clueless, abiding father would get her whatever she wanted, which consequently did more harm than good.

Well, we all have one of those fathers. Not the one that we buy a Father’s Day card for every year, but one that we carry in our wallet. One that typically says yes to whatever we want to buy, regardless of how that may spoil our budget, or worse, our credit score. It’s called a credit card.

Please understand, I am not calling you spoiled or demanding. However, in this instantaneous age, it’s very easy to spend impulsively or unconsciously. How many of us have gone to Target to purchase one or two items and ended up walking out with a full cart? How many of us have passed some idle time perusing one of our favorite online vendors, one who may even have our credit card information stored in their system? We may have had no intention to buy when we got on the site, but when we spot a good “deal,” it only takes a few quick clicks to make it ours.

You see, it happens a lot more often than you think. Study after study has shown that people will spend more money when they use credit cards than when they use cash, sometimes as much as twice the average cost for the same item1. Not only does the method of payment affect the quantity, it can also affect quality, with consumers willing to purchase unhealthy or unnecessary items when paying with a credit card as opposed to cash2.

The convenience of clicking or swiping to purchase, rather than handing over tangible cash, has spurred on overspending and racked up national credit card debt to $905 billion3. The truth of the matter is that we have lost sight of the fact that credit cards are essentially a thirty-day loan, which is becoming more and more apparent with the younger generations. Based on Experian’s Millennial Credit and Finance Survey Report Part II, 58 percent of millennial credit card holders polled in 2015 had maxed out a credit card, been charged a late fee, had an increase in the interest rate on a credit card, had a credit card declined or had defaulted on a credit card payment4. Financial behaviors like these can wreak a lot of havoc on a young person’s credit score and financial future. Such a small, seemingly innocent looking piece of plastic can do a lot of damage.

Now I am in no way advocating a credit-free lifestyle. Not only are credit cards a convenient way to build up your credit score, but many cards offer rewards programs where users can earn discounts, airline mileage and cash back. Most importantly, though, there are an increasing amount of vendors that no longer accept cash. This is not simply limited to online purchases. Have you ever tried leaving an airport parking lot or paying to access a toll road with cash? In most places, it is nearly impossible.

What I am saying is we need to start being a bit more mindful with our money, a bit more critical of how we spend. I mentioned the perks of credit cards rewards programs earlier. How many of us, though, have actually stopped to determine how much those perks really cost once you start adding up interest and impulse purchases? If switching over to cash purchases helps us become a bit more mindful with our money, then so be it.

Before you end up with a pile of debt and regret.

1. https://www.nerdwallet.com/blog/credit-cards/credit-cards-make-you-spend-more/

2. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-science-behind-behavior/201607/does-it-matter-whether-you-pay-cash-or-credit-card

3. https://www.nerdwallet.com/blog/average-credit-card-debt-household/

4. https://www.slideshare.net/Experian_US/experian-millennial-credit-finance-survey-report-part-ii

Money is a commonly held taboo topic, like politics and religion. We just don’t feel comfortable talking about them – especially to people we care about. That’s because these topics are tied closely to how we view ourselves. These topics also garner a lot of judgment, and the last thing we want is to be judged on something that we feel is intrinsically linked to our intelligence or sense of maturity. Yet, by practicing a few simple tips, we can start tackling the taboo topic of family finances and get on that path to financial independence.

Be Honest

It is human nature to want to hide things we may not be proud of or want to avoid. Perhaps you charged a bit too much to your credit cards or haven’t saved as much as you planned for all of your family’s goals. You may want to avoid addressing such issues, but those who are part of your financial household need to know the honest, unvarnished state of your finances. Trying to hide the facts will just compound your issues when they come to light – and they will.

Be Frequent

Don’t just talk about money when money is a problem. That’s when stress levels are high and emotions are frayed. What needs to be a level-headed discussion can quickly escalate into an emotional shouting match. Instead, conversations about finances should become routine. If you schedule a monthly financial date night with your spouse, the frequent exposure will minimize the surprise and anxiety from these talks. Ultimately, there will be fewer surprises and more planning to help when unexpected or hard decisions need to be made.

Be Open to Feedback

You and your spouse are a team. Teams succeed by working together towards the same goals. Teammates, though, don’t always see things the same way and may have different approaches to the same objective. That’s why it’s important to get your spouse’s input on how your finances are being managed. Not only does your spouse’s input ensure you’re working towards the same goals, but different perspectives can also provide multiple solutions to financial issues. Most importantly, your spouse feels heard and validated, which is a precious thing to give to the one you love.

Be Non-Judgmental

What causes many to shy away from discussing finances is the idea that they will be judged for things they did or did not do with their money. Did you mismanage your funds and refrain from saving sufficiently? Were you too risky with your investments or not risky enough to provide for the household? To avoid the judgment, most will just avoid talking about their finances all together, which doesn’t often have good outcomes. Avoidance doesn’t help financial situations – it often just prolongs the mess. To help your spouse open up, it is beneficial to allow them to speak openly and freely and to listen without judgment.

I do believe that it is imperative to take the taboo out of talking about money with your spouse. Both of you should foster frequent and honest financial discussions, free of strife and judgment. Doing these things will allow you to solidify yourselves as a strong financial team and set you on your path for collective financial independence.

The opinions voiced in this material are for general information only and are not intended to provide specific advice or recommendations for any individual.