Got Your Refund, Now What?

Money is a commonly held taboo topic, like politics and religion. We just don’t feel comfortable talking about them – especially to people we care about. That’s because these topics are tied closely to how we view ourselves. These topics also garner a lot of judgment, and the last thing we want is to be judged on something that we feel is intrinsically linked to our intelligence or sense of maturity. Yet, by practicing a few simple tips, we can start tackling the taboo topic of family finances and get on that path to financial independence.

Be Honest

It is human nature to want to hide things we may not be proud of or want to avoid. Perhaps you charged a bit too much to your credit cards or haven’t saved as much as you planned for all of your family’s goals. You may want to avoid addressing such issues, but those who are part of your financial household need to know the honest, unvarnished state of your finances. Trying to hide the facts will just compound your issues when they come to light – and they will.

Be Frequent

Don’t just talk about money when money is a problem. That’s when stress levels are high and emotions are frayed. What needs to be a level-headed discussion can quickly escalate into an emotional shouting match. Instead, conversations about finances should become routine. If you schedule a monthly financial date night with your spouse, the frequent exposure will minimize the surprise and anxiety from these talks. Ultimately, there will be fewer surprises and more planning to help when unexpected or hard decisions need to be made.

Be Open to Feedback

You and your spouse are a team. Teams succeed by working together towards the same goals. Teammates, though, don’t always see things the same way and may have different approaches to the same objective. That’s why it’s important to get your spouse’s input on how your finances are being managed. Not only does your spouse’s input ensure you’re working towards the same goals, but different perspectives can also provide multiple solutions to financial issues. Most importantly, your spouse feels heard and validated, which is a precious thing to give to the one you love.

Be Non-Judgmental

What causes many to shy away from discussing finances is the idea that they will be judged for things they did or did not do with their money. Did you mismanage your funds and refrain from saving sufficiently? Were you too risky with your investments or not risky enough to provide for the household? To avoid the judgment, most will just avoid talking about their finances all together, which doesn’t often have good outcomes. Avoidance doesn’t help financial situations – it often just prolongs the mess. To help your spouse open up, it is beneficial to allow them to speak openly and freely and to listen without judgment.

I do believe that it is imperative to take the taboo out of talking about money with your spouse. Both of you should foster frequent and honest financial discussions, free of strife and judgment. Doing these things will allow you to solidify yourselves as a strong financial team and set you on your path for collective financial independence.

The opinions voiced in this material are for general information only and are not intended to provide specific advice or recommendations for any individual.

When is the “end” of this Coronavirus season? Do we return to “normal” at the end of the summer? I have no idea. However, I do know that when it happens, I will have already given intentional thought to my plan to return because there are some lessons learned and best practices to hold on to during this period of being at home with my family and work. Here are just a few I’d thought I share:

Be Present. Being more present has always been a pursuit of mine. And amidst a shelter-in environment, I’ve been more present without the back and forth to the office. When we are present, we thrive. When we are present, we are listening to our clients. When we are present, we are having more fun with our family. Compare it to being in the zone in athletics. We are solely focused on the conversation or task at hand, making us ultimately more effective as leaders and parents. Be present.

Be Proactive. Even though none of us anticipated the spread of this virus, there have still been plenty of opportunities to be proactive. Despite the uncertainty, a forward-thinking strategy creates freedom and reassurance. Having the flexibility to make anticipated adjustments and then course correct from there helps us weather the difficult days and be ahead over the long-term. This relates to our financial strategy and our day-to-day structure with kids at home. Have a plan, discuss it, and see it to completion. That might result in a strategy to invest in the market with dollar-cost averaging or decide to double recipes so you don’t have to cook as much. Either way, be proactive in life and at work.

Keep Up Good Habits. I have enjoyed the opportunity to connect over Zoom. I’m still improving my ability to read the emotion through the technology but with the effectiveness of virtual meetings, could I plan to only have Zoom meetings on Friday and stay at home? This would give me a few more hours to spend with my family. I don’t think my clients would disagree with that. Give it some thought. Have there been practices at home that should continue? Read for 20 minutes in the middle of the day? Exercise at lunch?

I’ve been grateful for this time and yet I know, this has created immense difficulty for most people. Through my numerous conversations with clients and friends, I’ve been encouraged by the attitude and fortitude these times require. Here’s to having a plan before we return to normal again.

“The most powerful weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another. Train your mind to see the good in this day.” –Marc & Angel Chernoff

The opinions voiced in this material are for general information only and are not intended to provide specific advice or recommendations for any individual. To determine what is appropriate for you, consult a qualified professional.