Creative Generosity

Recently, I followed up with a client after the client had been away on a family vacation for two weeks. Prior to that trip, the chaos of summer, work travel, and meetings had prevented the client from following up with me on a minor but impactful recommendation I had encouraged the client to consider in our last conversation. Before I had the opportunity to even say, “Hello,” the client apologized and communicated that I was owed a phone call. Yes, I had encouraged a decision knowing the impact would further strengthen the client’s financial situation, but in my diligence, I didn’t expect a phone call. The definition of diligence: careful and persistent work or effort. I love the simplicity of this definition and the use of the words persistent and effort. From knowing the client, I know the client is incredibly diligent in her own work and personal life. You see, when my client picked up this phone call, and the diligence of my follow up had just replaced the client’s call, eased the burden of the client having to call me back (amidst her intense work schedule), and ultimately resulted in the client making a best decision to improve the efficiency and effectiveness of her plan after re-clarifying the client’s priorities and current time frames.

An ongoing and sound financial plan requires an immense amount of diligence. If you are not ready to double down on this level of diligence on your own, why not hire a Decision Coach and Certified Financial PlannerTM professional to sprinkle the entirety of your plan with some diligence? Have you rebalanced your 401(k) lately? Have you increased your contribution percentage after your last raise? Did you update your life insurance planning after you moved into a new home after your second child was born? Are you planning on saving for that dream trip to Europe, or is that just going to magically happen in the next five years? What are the trading fees on your brokerage account? You have given thought to each of these questions. You have even discussed the answers with your spouse or close friends. Yet, you are busy and these action items are on the top of your priority list on a Tuesday. All of these questions require thoughtful planning with ongoing diligence, communication, and action. As soon as you settle into a plan with the right cash flow, life happens and you will need to adjust the game plan. My client didn’t forget to call me back. My client wanted me to call me back. Yet, my client didn’t call me back and didn’t make up her mind, until I called. Was I upset that I had to follow up several times? Was I frustrated my client seemed non-responsive? Of course not! It’s my career and joy as a Decision Coach. It’s part of my role as your financial planner to be diligent, to hold you accountable, to help you make qualitatively better decisions over time. Do I expect this to take a few follow up calls and three incredibly productive and ongoing quarterly progress checks between annual reviews? Of course! I love crafting a game plan for you. I love when you approach a financial decision and prior to making a decision, you reach out to me. I want your plan to be dialed in, so ultimately, you are living the life you want now, saving for the life you want in the future, as I provide the guard rails of diligence all along the way. A lot happens in a year and all of those little decisions have a significant impact over a long arch of time. Why I am so diligent with your financial plan? So, you don’t always have to be…don’t apologize, let’s just make the next best decision together and I’ll handle the follow up so we can one day celebrate together, not just because you are retiring, but because of the life you lived to get there.

It’s no surprise that I often talk about the need to have a strong, supportive financial team to pursue financial independence. These financial teams can consist of a CPA, an estate planning attorney or a real estate agent, with your trusted financial advisor acting as the general manager of your team. While each one provides a specialized level of expertise, for individuals who are married, there is another person that can make or break your route to financial independence: your spouse. Often, we underestimate the value your spouse brings to your financial house, which is why it is so important to make them the MVP of your financial team.

In order to pursue financial independence, couples must be on the same page and work together towards common goals. For many, though, that is just not the case. Nearly half of U.S. couples argue over finances.[i] These disagreements can be based on resentment over spending rather than saving. Sometimes arguments arise over differing risk tolerance. The heart of these issues lies in goal mismatch, a situation that arises when your combined goals are not aligned. When you and your spouse are not working together towards your combined financial independence, chances of reaching it are slim.

While some couples argue, others simply don’t communicate. Both people in a marriage need to be involved in their finances, agreeing on their financial goals and the steps they’re taking to get there. Being unaware of your financial household, whether it’s because only one person in the relationship is in charge of the household finances or because both parties have decided to keep separate financial lives, simply causes problems. When you don’t know what the other is doing with their money, you can’t be sure that you’re both working towards the same goals in the most effective way. Additionally, you may be setting yourself up for unfortunate complications if your partner unexpectedly passes or becomes incapacitated. Honestly, I’d rather have my clients argue than avoid discussing finances. At least they’re talking about it.

So how do you and your spouse get on the same page? You can start by taking my financial compatibility quiz. Not only will the quiz show you what areas the two of you are like-minded and what areas you need to work on, but it’ll also give you the conversation starters to mine those areas you may not see eye-to-eye on. If you need a little more guidance on what to talk about, you can check out my book, The Couple’s Guide to Financial Compatibility. Also, make sure to get some time for yourself for date night – particularly a Financial Date Night. Make the investment for a babysitter to ensure some consistent quality time where you can have open, honest discussions on big-picture issues and long-term goals. For those really tough topics, you can use a trusted Financial Advisor to help you navigate the conversation.

I am a firm believer in investing in your future. Whether you invest in a book, a babysitter or your time, these investments go a long way to ensure your marital financial health. It’s when you make sure that you’re working together with your spouse that you build a strong and sure route to your financial independence.

[i] https://nypost.com/2017/08/03/the-reasons-most-couples-argue-about-money/

The opinions voiced in this material are for general information only and are not intended to provide specific advice or recommendations for any individual. To determine what is appropriate for you, consult a qualified professional.