Aren’t All Target Date Retirement Funds the Same? Spoiler Alert: No

Imagine a recipe box that’s been passed down from your great grandmother. It sits on your kitchen counter, full of cards containing not just ingredient lists and cooking instructions,  but handwritten notes detailing memories about each meal. It’s these personal anecdotes that transform food into feeling through stories.

That’s how a legacy letter works. It’s a way to pass on what matters most to you.

What is a Legacy Letter?

Unlike a will that distributes material possessions, a legacy letter, sometimes known as an ethical will, passes on your values, life lessons, hopes, and personal history to future generations. It serves to bridge the gap between the tangible inheritance you might leave behind and the intangible wisdom you've gathered throughout your life.

While a legacy letter can complement a legal will, it should be thought of as a personal document rather than a legal directive. You can consider your legacy letter a conversation across time – a way to share yourself with your great-grandchildren and future generations.

What are the Benefits of Writing a Legacy Letter?

Your legacy letter will benefit both you as the writer and the letter’s recipients. For the writer, it offers the chance to reflect on and crystallize what matters most in your life. We find the process often brings clarity to our clients around their deepest values and the impact they hope their assets will have on their loved ones.

For recipients, your legacy letter can help ground them in their family history, which often gets reduced to dates and basic facts. Through your letter, you give them the gift of context, understanding, and connection. Your legacy letter becomes a way for your perspective and guidance to live on after you’re gone.

What are the Components of a Legacy Letter?

Just like your life, your legacy letter is entirely unique. And while there’s certainly no required formula for one, they most often include the following elements:

1. Values and Beliefs: Explain not just what you believe in, but why. Share the experiences that challenged or reinforced your values.
2. Life Lessons: Discuss both your successes and failures. What decisions are you most proud of? What would you do differently? Mistakes and vulnerable moments are often more effective teachers than perfection.
3. Family Stories: Include meaningful anecdotes about family members, especially those your recipients never met. What family traditions hold special meaning and why?
4. Hopes for the Future: Express your wishes for future generations without being prescriptive or giving explicit direction. Share the dreams you have for your family’s future.

Who Should You Share Your Legacy Letter With?

Most people write legacy letters primarily for their children and grandchildren, but you might also consider including other family members and close friends.

Having an idea of who your audience will be before you start writing will help you strike the right tone and include the most relevant content. Keep in mind that future generations will likely read your letter as well.

How and When to Share Your Legacy Letter

The timing and method of sharing your legacy letter deserve careful consideration. Some people choose to save their letters to be read after they pass, but there can be profound value in sharing your words and story while you’re still here, particularly during significant life moments such as a child’s graduation, before a wedding, or upon the birth of a grandchild.

If you decide to share your letter while living, you have several options:

Reading it aloud in person allows you to add context and emotion to your words and can lead to meaningful family discussions that encourage others to share their own stories.

Creating individual copies for each recipient lets them absorb your words privately and return to them often. Some people include photos or other meaningful documents alongside their letters.

Recording yourself reading your letter combines your words and your voice into a powerful audio-visual legacy that can also be relistened to as often as the recipient wants.

If you prefer your letter to be shared after your passing, ensure someone you trust knows where to find it and understands your wishes for its distribution. Consider including it with your other important documents or lodging it with your attorney.

Timing isn't just about when others receive your letter; it's also about when you write it. Don't wait for the “perfect” moment or until you feel you have all the answers. Your perspective and wisdom are valuable now, and you can always edit or write additional letters as you gain new insights or want to share different aspects of your story.

How to Get Started: Five Questions to Ask Yourself

Deciding to write your legacy letter is the first step, but it can be challenging to know exactly where to begin. We’ve found these questions help jumpstart the writing process:

1. What moments of adversity have shaped who you are? Don't just list challenges you've overcome. Dig deeper into how these experiences changed your perspective and influenced your decisions, and share what you learned from your most difficult times that might help future generations navigate their own struggles?
2. What family traditions or values do you want to share? Think beyond the obvious. Maybe your grandfather's habit of giving anonymous gifts to neighbors in need taught you about quiet generosity, or perhaps your mother's insistence on Sunday dinners wasn't just about food, but about creating unbreakable family bonds.
3. What parts of your story might be lost if you don't share them? Consider the small but significant moments that shaped your path. Maybe it was a chance encounter that ultimately led you to your career, or a split-second decision that changed everything. It’s these personal details that often get lost in formal family histories but can be incredibly meaningful to future generations.
4. What do you wish you knew about your own ancestors? Reflect on the questions you have about your family history. What gaps in your own family narrative do you wish were filled? Use these curiosities to guide what you share about yourself.
5. What misunderstandings about your life choices do you want to clarify? Perhaps you made a later-in-life career change that seemed risky to others, or your decision to end a marriage wasn't fully understood. Your legacy letter offers the opportunity to share your reasoning and the wisdom that guided these choices, but take care not to sound defensive. The goal is to help your loved ones and future generations make their own choices that are best for them.

Some people find the thought of writing intimidating, but your legacy letter isn’t about being the most eloquent or perfectly polished. It’s about being authentic and genuine, keeping your audience in mind, and truly reflecting on what matters most in your life.

Start today. Your story matters, and future generations will be grateful you took the time to share it.

Don’t we all just love the holidays? Having a nice, large Thanksgiving meal with close family and friends? Unwrapping presents during Christmas or Hanukkah, seeing the big smiles on the young kids and grandkids as they rip open that favorite toy they begged for? It may be pure bliss during the months of November and December, but come January and February, when those credit card statements come in, the stress starts to set in.

According to the article here,   the average person takes more than five months to pay off that holiday debt. Many more carry that into the next holiday season, hence carrying it indefinitely and having it snowball out of control. Many people just make the minimum payment on credit cards throughout the year, and then when the holidays come about, go crazy with buying up everything, their balance goes up, and so does that minimum payment, which they soon cannot afford to pay. Defaults on credit cards and people trying to do balance transfers or debt consolidation soon become the norm and the house of cards (literally) soon falls.

44% of people surveyed stated that they were stressed out because of that extra holiday debt. Among all age groups, Millennials were most likely to go into debt around the holidays. People ages 24-35 were most likely to say they went into debt this holiday season with a rate of 14.3%. With the exception of 45-54-year-olds, the likelihood of going into debt decreased with age. Seniors were least likely to say they went into debt, with a rate of 7.6%.

So how can we mitigate or eliminate this holiday debt altogether?

Start a holiday-saving account: Set aside a holiday or Christmas budget at the beginning of each year! The problem that many people run into is that they do not set a holiday season budget and just spend, spend, spend. We have many clients who save anywhere from $50-200/month starting in January, so that they have their full budget come the 4th quarter. Or, if you are out shopping throughout the year and see a great sale on something that a family member or close friend would like, feel free to buy it, to pace yourself. If it’s within the budget, you should be ok.

Change your tax withholdings: It’s also a proven fact that many people over-pay their taxes throughout the year, over-withholding on their paychecks. The average person pays their amount of taxes by the spring or summertime, and the rest of the year is just spent paying more to Uncle Sam, lining his pockets. We have had many clients who come through our office in the 3rd or 4th quarter, and after we look at their tax returns for the previous year, as long as everything is a constant, we ascertain that they have already paid all of their taxes for the year. They can then increase their withholdings on their paycheck, thus bringing in more income monthly, to allow them to pay for the holiday’s cash. Solution: no post-holiday blues. Then, come January, we would review the client’s situation again, many times working alongside their CPA, to help them get to more of a point of breaking even or getting just a small tax refund back at tax time. This would allow them to better plan out their budget for the year.

Can you change your schedule: Other things to consider to have a credit card-free holiday is to work overtime, if your job allows it, or if you get a bonus throughout the year, to set that aside for the holiday season. But don’t count on it, as you can’t always rely on bonuses, commissions, or pay raises to occur when you want them to.

If you are a people-person and don’t mind strangers in your car, consider driving for Lyft or Uber. I believe they offer tiered bonuses if you complete a certain amount of rides during your first 30 days of working and always have promotions going on. That’s an instant quick bonus for one or two months of work. Many retailers, as well as Amazon, hire hundreds or thousands of seasonal part-timers, to help with the holiday rush. Maybe you can even use that employee discount at that retail store you’d be working at to get a good deal on some presents. UPS and FedEx also hire extra drivers and warehouse employees to sort through all of those packages that are being delivered the last two months of the year.

Conclusion: Get creative and don’t get complacent. You can do this!

Action items:

Understand where your money actually went.

There are many great apps out there which can track your spending throughout the year, and help you stay up on things, so things don’t spiral out of control

Set a realistic budget of what you will spend on family, friends, co-workers, and even clients, if it merits it in your situation, so you don’t break the bank

Work with a trusted financial advisor/coach that can hold you accountable on your spending, so you can keep pace to reach your financial goals

Good luck and let us know your progress!  Enjoy the holidays and create some lifetime memories!

[1] http://www.magnifymoney.com/blog/featured/americans-holiday-debt-added-1003-average-year/