4 Ways to Take the Taboo Out of Talking About Money with Your Spouse

By
Jeff Motske, CFP®
November 26, 2018
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Money is a commonly held taboo topic, like politics and religion. We just don’t feel comfortable talking about them – especially to people we care about. That’s because these topics are tied closely to how we view ourselves. These topics also garner a lot of judgment, and the last thing we want is to be judged on something that we feel is intrinsically linked to our intelligence or sense of maturity. Yet, by practicing a few simple tips, we can start tackling the taboo topic of family finances and get on that path to financial independence.

Be Honest

It is human nature to want to hide things we may not be proud of or want to avoid. Perhaps you charged a bit too much to your credit cards or haven’t saved as much as you planned for all of your family’s goals. You may want to avoid addressing such issues, but those who are part of your financial household need to know the honest, unvarnished state of your finances. Trying to hide the facts will just compound your issues when they come to light – and they will.

Be Frequent

Don’t just talk about money when money is a problem. That’s when stress levels are high and emotions are frayed. What needs to be a level-headed discussion can quickly escalate into an emotional shouting match. Instead, conversations about finances should become routine. If you schedule a monthly financial date night with your spouse, the frequent exposure will minimize the surprise and anxiety from these talks. Ultimately, there will be fewer surprises and more planning to help when unexpected or hard decisions need to be made.

Be Open to Feedback

You and your spouse are a team. Teams succeed by working together towards the same goals. Teammates, though, don’t always see things the same way and may have different approaches to the same objective. That’s why it’s important to get your spouse’s input on how your finances are being managed. Not only does your spouse’s input ensure you’re working towards the same goals, but different perspectives can also provide multiple solutions to financial issues. Most importantly, your spouse feels heard and validated, which is a precious thing to give to the one you love.

Be Non-Judgmental

What causes many to shy away from discussing finances is the idea that they will be judged for things they did or did not do with their money. Did you mismanage your funds and refrain from saving sufficiently? Were you too risky with your investments or not risky enough to provide for the household? To avoid the judgment, most will just avoid talking about their finances all together, which doesn’t often have good outcomes. Avoidance doesn’t help financial situations – it often just prolongs the mess. To help your spouse open up, it is beneficial to allow them to speak openly and freely and to listen without judgment.

I do believe that it is imperative to take the taboo out of talking about money with your spouse. Both of you should foster frequent and honest financial discussions, free of strife and judgment. Doing these things will allow you to solidify yourselves as a strong financial team and set you on your path for collective financial independence.

The opinions voiced in this material are for general information only and are not intended to provide specific advice or recommendations for any individual.

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By
Steve Hartel, MBA, AIF®
September 27, 2017

Most of us know you can use assets in a retirement investment account or an annuity to generate income during retirement. But did you know you can use certain kinds of life insurance policies to do the same thing?

What kind of life insurance?

There are two primary types of life insurance: term and permanent. To use an analogy, think of a term policy as renting a home, and think of a permanent policy as buying a home. Similar to building equity in a home you are buying, permanent policies usually have a feature where they accumulate money inside them called Cash Value. In the same way that a mortgage payment is divided into principal (equity) and interest (the cost of the loan), the premium payment for a properly designed permanent life policy is divided into Cash Value (equity) and the cost of insurance (paying for the actual death benefit). In addition to your own money, the insurance company typically credits your policy with interest or dividends each year, so the Cash Value grows over time.

Note: There are different types of permanent policies (for example, Whole Life, Universal Life, Variable Universal Life, etc.) and they each have their plusses and minuses. Describing the differences would be lengthy and outside the scope of this article. For simplicity’s sake, I’m going to base the rest of this article on Universal Life.

So far, it sounds like an expensive savings account. What am I missing?

Using a life insurance policy to accumulate savings has some key differences from a savings account at your bank. First, the life policy offers tax deferred growth. In a bank savings account, you must report the interest you earn every year and pay income tax on it. The Cash Value in a life policy gets to grow tax deferred, just like in a qualified retirement account. Without having to pay taxes along the way, your money grows faster.

Second, the interest rate that an insurance company pays is typically much higher than the interest rate that a bank will pay on a savings account. For example, at the time of this article, the national average interest rate on a bank savings account is 0.06%1, whereas universal life policies typically average around 3%-5%.2

The biggest difference between Cash Value and a bank savings account has to do with taking the money out. With a bank account, you can only take out the dollars that are there, but there is a way to take money out of a life policy that is leveraged3.

OK, how do I get the money out?

Although the insurance company would allow you to simply withdraw the cash value, that option has a big drawback. The amount of gain in the policy (the current cash value minus the dollars you contributed along the way) would be taxed at ordinary income tax rates. There is a better option.

Insurance companies offer a way to borrow against the cash value in your policy. The proceeds from the loan are tax-free. It is important to note that you are borrowing against the cash value, not from the cash value. That means your entire cash value balance continues to earn interest. Contrast that with any other type of account, where when you withdraw money, the only portion of your money that continues to earn is the money remaining in the account.

Just as with most loans, you must pay interest on the amount you borrow. The life insurance company will typically charge 4%-5% interest. However, the cash value continues to earn 3%-5% interest, so your net cost for the loan might only be 0%-1%. No other vehicle I know of allows you to do this!

But when I’m retired, isn’t taking out a loan a bad idea?

Typically, we want to reduce our fixed expenses during retirement. And typically, adding a fixed loan payment to our retirement budget would indeed be a bad idea. However, taking a loan from your life policy doesn’t add any payments to your budgets. None. In fact, the insurance company doesn’t even expect you to repay this loan during your lifetime. At your death, the loan will be paid off from a portion of the death benefit, while the remainder will go to your beneficiaries. In a well-designed policy, your death benefit will grow over time. This should allow you to borrow tax-free income every year during retirement, pay off the loan when you die, and still have a sizeable death benefit remaining for your beneficiaries.

One small but important caution

What makes this entire strategy possible is the way life insurance proceeds are taxed. Loans taken against the policy are not taxed, nor is the death benefit taxed when received by your beneficiaries. If you take out too much money from the policy and don’t leave enough inside to pay the continuing cost of the policy, the policy will lapse (meaning the insurance company will cancel the policy). If that happens while you are still alive, then the IRS wipes out all of the tax benefits, and all that money you took out becomes taxable. That is a tax bill you want to avoid at all costs.

How do I add this strategy to my retirement plan?

Designing a policy correctly requires experience and advanced training. Many agents who only sell policies and don’t do financial planning may not be properly trained in the intricacies of this strategy. Make sure you get your policy from a reputable advisor who fully understands this strategy, and who can show you how it fits into the rest of your financial plan. This is not the kind of policy you want to buy over the internet or from an 800 number!

https://www.valuepenguin.com/banking/average-bank-interest-rates

Kelly, Patrick. (2007). Tax-Free Retirement

Dictionary.com defines leverage as “the use of a small initial investment, credit, or borrowed funds to gain a very high return in relation to one's investment, to control a much larger investment, or to reduce one's own liability for any loss.” http://www.dictionary.com/browse/leverage

By
Jeff Motske, CFP®
December 7, 2018

Giving to charitable causes can be a very emotional thing. You’re supporting something near to your heart, possibly with a deep personal connection. However, if you’re not mindful, it is possible to give at the expense of yourself. Be sure you don’t let your heartstrings control your purse strings.

Forethought and planning should extend over all your financial decisions, including charitable giving. For a variety of reasons, many don’t follow a plan. Some give whatever’s left in their budget, perhaps not as much as they’d like or tempting them to give more than they can afford. Others give at the end of the year for the tax break. Alternatively, perhaps charitable giving isn’t planned for at all, which allows one to be swayed by emotion when the right cause comes along. Suddenly, they can be committing based on what they feel rather than what’s best for their finances.

Once you decide to factor your charitable giving into your annual financial plan, you can start doing your research. Not only do you determine which causes you want to support, but you can also investigate various organizations that service that cause. There are many websites that evaluate charitable organizations to ensure that your financial contributions or going where you want. Additionally, having your charitable giving worked into your financial plan allows you to turn down other charitable requests graciously. Should you be approached, you can mention your annual giving plan and that you will consider them for the following year.

Being mindful about your charitable giving also gives you the opportunity to influence your children or loved ones on how to do the same. Your actions become the example to your values. While you needn’t share all the details, you can openly share how you formulated your plan and why. The more people who become aware of how to consciously create an annual giving plan, the more people are actively working towards their financial independence.

I don’t think it’s possible to take all emotion out of your connection to a charitable cause, and I don’t think you should. However, I will always be an advocate of folks proactively working towards their financial independence. The key to that is approaching your finances with reason and logic, relegating our emotions to the backseat and holding firm to your purse strings.

Get Started on Your Financial Life Plan Today