3 Lessons Learned During a Difficult Season

Money is a commonly held taboo topic, like politics and religion. We just don’t feel comfortable talking about them – especially to people we care about. That’s because these topics are tied closely to how we view ourselves. These topics also garner a lot of judgment, and the last thing we want is to be judged on something that we feel is intrinsically linked to our intelligence or sense of maturity. Yet, by practicing a few simple tips, we can start tackling the taboo topic of family finances and get on that path to financial independence.

Be Honest

It is human nature to want to hide things we may not be proud of or want to avoid. Perhaps you charged a bit too much to your credit cards or haven’t saved as much as you planned for all of your family’s goals. You may want to avoid addressing such issues, but those who are part of your financial household need to know the honest, unvarnished state of your finances. Trying to hide the facts will just compound your issues when they come to light – and they will.

Be Frequent

Don’t just talk about money when money is a problem. That’s when stress levels are high and emotions are frayed. What needs to be a level-headed discussion can quickly escalate into an emotional shouting match. Instead, conversations about finances should become routine. If you schedule a monthly financial date night with your spouse, the frequent exposure will minimize the surprise and anxiety from these talks. Ultimately, there will be fewer surprises and more planning to help when unexpected or hard decisions need to be made.

Be Open to Feedback

You and your spouse are a team. Teams succeed by working together towards the same goals. Teammates, though, don’t always see things the same way and may have different approaches to the same objective. That’s why it’s important to get your spouse’s input on how your finances are being managed. Not only does your spouse’s input ensure you’re working towards the same goals, but different perspectives can also provide multiple solutions to financial issues. Most importantly, your spouse feels heard and validated, which is a precious thing to give to the one you love.

Be Non-Judgmental

What causes many to shy away from discussing finances is the idea that they will be judged for things they did or did not do with their money. Did you mismanage your funds and refrain from saving sufficiently? Were you too risky with your investments or not risky enough to provide for the household? To avoid the judgment, most will just avoid talking about their finances all together, which doesn’t often have good outcomes. Avoidance doesn’t help financial situations – it often just prolongs the mess. To help your spouse open up, it is beneficial to allow them to speak openly and freely and to listen without judgment.

I do believe that it is imperative to take the taboo out of talking about money with your spouse. Both of you should foster frequent and honest financial discussions, free of strife and judgment. Doing these things will allow you to solidify yourselves as a strong financial team and set you on your path for collective financial independence.

The opinions voiced in this material are for general information only and are not intended to provide specific advice or recommendations for any individual.

In almost every journal entry I write, I include, “I am grateful for…” and list three to four items from my day that reminded me of how grateful I am. Just last night my wife of 10 years, laughed out at loud as she noticed, I had written, “Popcorn” as I enjoyed a bag in the last minutes of the evening after putting our young boys to bed. It is the little things that make life grand, right?

In light of the deep gratitude I experience on a daily basis, here are 8 financial planning action items I’m grateful for. I know my clients feel the same way because of the significant impact these ideas have over time:

1. Automatic monthly savings plans into investment accounts.

I am grateful because these plans create structure and commitment.

2. The proper 401(k) allocation.

I am grateful to help align risk, time frames, performance, and cost with the fund options available.

3. Roth IRAs and Roth 401(k)s.

I am grateful because we are in a historically low tax environment and Uncle Sam has already been paid.

4. Intentional and proactive communication with an Advisor.

I am grateful to help eliminate inefficiencies and “leaking out the back door” with surplus cash flow.

5. The right insurance solution.

I am grateful for financial reassurance.

6. An understanding of where my current savings rate ends up at the end of the road.

I am grateful when I can provide clarity to planning so that my clients know what they are actually saving for.

7. An outside, objective, fiduciary perspective.

I am grateful when a client calls asking about a refinance option, a car purchase, or stock options. Even though I don’t directly manage these decisions, they do have an impact on your financial plan.

8. Non-retirement investment accounts earmarked for future priorities.

I am grateful when clients can save and grow their money, yet still have access to their funds for that next down payment, big trip, or redoing the kitchen.

Yes, I am grateful for buttery popcorn, but more importantly, I am grateful for the motivation and trust of my clients and business partners.

The opinions voiced in this material are for general information only and are not intended to provide specific advice or recommendations for any individual. To determine what is appropriate for you, consult a qualified professional.